There are days that go by over the year that I wish the kids were all grown up. I get frustrated and angry and all bent out of shape over the silliest things. "Why", I ask my son all the time when he does things with out thinking them through. I repeat myself over and over again to my daughter either because she does not understand or she does not listen or maybe she forgot (yea right). These are the times I get the most frustrated and wish these days were over.
Then the evening comes. And we are all relaxing after dinner watching a little TV. 10 minutes into the movie my son comes over and caresses my hand and says "I Love You Mommy. Can I sit in your lap?” Of course I say yes, even though he is getting so big I cannot see past his head to watch the movie. But that’s ok, because he is growing up way too fast. He is 7 now.
Then 20 minutes into the movie, my daughter comes over and tries to share my lap with my son. Now I am sweating like there is no tomorrow and I can hardly breath but I cherish this discomfort because my daughter is growing up way too fast too. She is almost 4 now.
As I sit there trying to listen to the movie through the soft bickering of "You move". No you move", and I can't really see what is going on in the silent parts of the movie; my butt is so sweaty it feels as if I have peed my pants. I am now taken back by my harshness, anger, frustration and the thoughts I had all day of wanting them to grow up so I can get past this "tough part". I kiss both their tiny heads and apologize. "I'm sorry my babies! Mommy loves you so much!" My daughter says "OK! Love you too." My son replies, "Love you too. What ya sorry for?" "For any hurt I have caused you today." "That’s Ok mommy. You didn't hurt me. You loved me." At that very moment I realize I do not want them to grow up.
I have to constantly remind myself that each day and each situation is only a moment in this vast time we call life. Each frustration will pass so fast if I just let it fall off my back. Each moment of anger will pass if I just breathe a few extra breaths. And each year will pass before I even know they have passed. Seven years ago I never thought I would be here today. I thought it would be forever before my son could read and write. And here I am today. Just a moment in time.
I guess my whole point is that we need to savor each of those Mommy moments no matter how bad they may be or how good. Our children need a Mother everyday, even on Mothers Day. Because it will not be long before that Moment in Time comes and the kids are gone out of our house. Cherish these days and have a happy active Mother's day.
For some reason it would not let me download the actual video, so here is the link to a great Mothers Day Video produced by Anthony Nitz.
http://www.tangle.com/view_video.php?viewkey=a4b7e64ff4f58919f602&page=13&viewtype=&category=mvd
The sound in the beginning of a woman giving birth...that is me and my son being born 7 years ago. Sniff, sniff!
2 comments:
I hope your bible study is going well. I've been reading the daily bible. It's so good with helping me read the bible in a year.
Zinnada<><
Oh, well, I am a week behind in reading and 2 weeks in writing. I got sick with migrains on and off for 4 weeks in a row and reading just about anything as well as teaching was not on my todo list. Now we have those under control so this week is my get caught up and put all my hand writen notes in the computer and get caught up on the readings that I am behind on.
Thanks for keeping me accountable! How is it going with you? Still caught up?
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